That affective addiction. A phenomenon that has become popular by media and social networks in recent years. A term for an unhealthy, unconscious relationship between two individuals. We would even say, an unhealthy attachment from one person to another. Emotional dependence is when our love for ourselves and our self-esteem depend on another person. Without it, we do not know how to love one another. We do not even know how to live anymore. Our whole little world is actually attached to her, and if she leaves us, everything breaks down. Often confused with passionate love, emotional addiction can have serious consequences for a person’s mental (and even physical) health. That’s why we reveal to you how to get out of emotional addiction.
How To Know That You Are Suffering From Emotional Addiction
The first step to getting out of affective addiction, and probably the most difficult and crucial, is to identify the evil in question. This poses a particular difficulty because the addict is often like a prisoner of his discomfort. He often thinks it’s a normal condition, a result of the way his relationship is structured. In fact, it is rather his perception of the relationships in question that is at stake. Identifying an emotional addiction requires a great deal of distance in order to identify the symptoms and draw the right conclusions. This approach can be facilitated with the help of a relative who necessarily wants more height, but the initial effort still needs to be made by the relative: if the latter does not want to open up to constructive criticism, no outsider can do it for him.
Signs of an emotional addiction
If you are unsure whether you are emotionally addicted or not, there are a few signs that can warn you:
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- inability to be happy alone
- do not know how to make decisions
- the need to please
- deny one’s identity
- plays a savior / victim role
- must be reassured
- not being able to live without each other
- accept the unacceptable
- cling to each other
- fear of being abandoned
Do not overestimate a person
Someone who suffers from affective addiction tends to subconsciously raise the people she cares about on pedestals, that is, to imagine them much more incredible and deserving than they are. This process diminishes the sense of worthlessness that the addict feels: it is because he does not feel up to it that he fears losing his loved ones. Eliminating this tendency to want to believe that the people we love are better than us in every way is a significant step in getting out of emotional addiction.
Work on self-esteem to combat emotional addiction
If the first step is to deconstruct the superiority we have of the opposite person, the second is logical to develop our self-esteem. Without self-confidence, a person cannot love himself. If she does not love herself, she will never be able to live a healthy relationship because of the feeling of deception that she will systematically feel and will remain trapped by her affective addiction.
Here are some tips for gradually regaining confidence:
- get out of your comfort zone
- be proud of yourself
- highlight your abilities and qualities
- allow yourself the right to miss
- set goals
- focus on the essentials
Do not get out of emotional addiction alone
Get out of emotional addiction is a difficult process. It does not happen with a flick of the finger. Third-party support is essential. It will be necessary to become aware of areas for improvement thanks to an objective opinion, but also to offer a reassuring shoulder when the situation becomes too difficult. It is possible to leave alone affective addiction, but it would add a significant, completely unnecessary difficulty. Do not hesitate to consult professionals if you feel the need: Psychologists, for example, are fully trained in this type of problem.
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