When someone breaks your heart, it’s hard to get over the bad experience. Unfortunately, the people you date after bad love experiences are affected by what others have done to you.
Healing a broken heart is not an easy task and it can take years to get over it. Whether you have had bad experiences that made you deeply hurt or you are with someone who has been disappointed in love, keep in mind that it takes time and patience to get over it.
Twelve bad experiences that can affect your new relationship
1. Lack of communication
Communication is essential if you want to make a relationship work. When you do not communicate, it creates misunderstandings, arguments and frustration between the two of you.
Narcissists are very manipulative and toxic to love. They do not like you, they just want to use you to get through life and reach their goals. The problem is that these individuals have inflated egos that are difficult to deal with in a relationship.
The manipulative person will use and abuse you for their own gain, and they may even become violent to put you in your place. Getting out of such a complicated relationship will definitely leave scars. According to the National Library of Medicine, narcissists have had childhood problems that they buried deeply, and this affects their view of themselves.
3. Substance abuse
Substance abuse can range from alcohol to illegal drugs. When someone has an addiction, they will use their last penny to get their fix. If you have lived with someone who was a drug addict, you know how harmful it can be for you and the whole family. While some people get drunk and fall asleep, others become very aggressive.
4. Verbal abuse
Insults are a common reaction in arguments. But being offended, even in the heat of the moment, can have long-term consequences. When the person you love insults you all day long, it hurts your self-esteem.
Infidelity is one of the worst things one can experience in a relationship. When one person is unfaithful to their partner, it is devastating for the other partner. It usually signals that something is wrong or that his needs are not being met.
Infidelity is one of the main causes of trust issues. Although the person you are with now may never plan to cheat on you, you are likely to be suspicious of your next relationship. Learning to trust again after a broken heart will take time and patience.
Trust is an essential foundation of a couple’s life. When someone tends to lie, it is not difficult to understand. The person you lied to will have a hard time trusting them again, and you may become suspicious if your new partner tells you they are working late. You may want him to show you proof of something that is not working for you.
Jealousy is a major problem that can ruin relationships. Once you have been cheated, you can become jealous to prevent it from happening again.
8. Physical violence
Physical abuse is pain that affects you both physically and mentally. The wounds from the blows disappear, but the mental sequelae are not so easy to remove.
Although in many cases it is women who experience physical violence, there are also many men who experience it every day.
Disputes with in-laws
Mothers-in-law get a bad rap because they tend to overprotect their children. However, you may have problems with any family member, especially if they like to give their opinion about your relationship.
Conflicts with in-laws can ruin your union because the person you love will have to set boundaries at some point. Unfortunately, when you are in conflict with your partner’s mother, father, sister or brother, they do not usually put that person in their place out of respect. If you’ve been in such a relationship, you might want to think twice about getting involved with someone who has overbearing parents.
10. Mental illness
Mental illness is difficult to live with due to the stigma. While many people would see no reason to leave someone they love if they started using a wheelchair, they often think differently when they hear voices or suffer from mental breakdown.
Any illness can take a heavy toll on you and a relationship, and it can be enough to scare you into getting involved with someone again.
11. Financial difficulties
When there is a lack of money or someone who spends too much, you live in fear. Financial stability is the key to controlling your anxiety and everyone wants to know that they have enough money to pay the bills and fill their fridge.
12. Gas lighting
Gaslighting is not a fun experience to have, and many people who commit such an act have an underlying mental illness. Gas light means someone is trying to make you doubt your reason by manipulating you.