According to an INSEE study, 6 out of 10 men are older than their spouses, but only 8% of couples are more than 10 years old. There has been a change in recent years: the average age difference seems to be widening. How do these couples, who have been opposed for almost a generation, live? Is it possible to live a balanced relationship when the two partners are not at the same time in their lives?
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Laurène is 38 years old, she is a business manager and she has been in a relationship for 4 years with Adam, 24, a student. They met at the wedding of Laurene’s brother: “I had been in a relationship for 10 years with a man I was planning to have children with. My life was mapped. I had my box, which started to work, a man in my life “an apartment. I did not miss anything. But during my brother’s wedding weekend, I met Adam and it blew everything up.”
Adam has been a friend of Laurène’s brother for many years: “They had been together in the same sports club for years. I was never aware of him because I was never too much aware of my brother’s friends, I must admit. For me it was still a bunch immature children partying too much.At the time of the wedding Adam was 20 years old but he already looked like a guy ready to settle down.He is the youngest of the herd but he is also the most mature.They others winked at him because he did not want to get drunk or hit my cousins. Instead, we ended up talking and then could not stop. “
A shocking encounter
When Laurène returns from the wedding, she is sad: “My friend at the time was making fun of me because I had spent the evening with a young person. He did not even imagine that I could fall in love. Me, I was in shock at the attraction I had felt for him and what it might well mean.It’s not at all my style plans with beautiful children.I’m a responsible woman who likes stability.And because that was also what I felt and liked Adam, I contacted him to have a cup of coffee together. “
The meeting confirms his infatuation: “I felt like I had found the man of my life. Except that the man of my life was a child 14 years younger than me and a friend of my brother. I did not dare tell him how much I liked him It was he who took the first step. He told me that he was well aware that it seemed to be something other than that I was the woman he had loved the most in his life and that he did not wanted to miss it. But he did not want to be my lover. He really wanted to build something. So he asked me to leave my boyfriend. I told him I would think about it and I went. “
Laurène takes a week to make her decision: “I left my buddy after a week, but to be honest, I would say that deep down I knew I would do it from the first hours of reflection. I just had need to feel like I had digested this, that I knew where I was going to eg I told him the whole truth and obviously he was furious.He left the apartment to me because he did not want to live somewhere there would be memories of me.It took him two weeks to pack up and disappear from my life.I understand his anger but I wish he had understood that it was not against him.I think he thought it was a stupid decision on my part I hope time will convince him that I had the right to make this bet. “
One step after another
Subsequently, Laurène and Adam officially become a couple: “We knew we wanted to be together, so we did not have a reflection phase. We talked to my brother first and then to my parents. We lived together almost immediately. It was not there. actually a honeymoon but I did not care.Almost everyone disagreed.On the other hand he was told that it was some shit to get along .. put with an older woman that he would find himself caught up with children too small. On my part, they judged my choice and they called me a “puma”. But we did not care and we had reason. “
Little by little, their relationship and their love for them speak: “We are not trying to prove anything, but since we are happy, our story has been accepted by our loved ones. And now more than 4 years have passed, so it starts to take a long time for a touch of madness. “
They are now considering having a child together: “Adam feels ready, and so do I. I think our couple is strong enough for this upheaval. I know he is the man in my life. I knew it first night “That he is 14 years apart from me does not change anything. I liked him, not his marital status documents or his resume. I’m fine with him, better than I’ve ever been with anyone. If I had to do it again, I would do it again without hesitation. “
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